Sharon Sum lifts our spirits in this fringe performance that fights back against crushing depression with hope and wonder.

What are the things worth living for? As part of National Suicide Prevention Month, Gateway Arts presents a new staging Duncan Macmillan’s critically-acclaimed one-person play Every Brilliant Thing, as directed by Oliver Chong and starring Sharon Sum. Chong himself previously starred in a Mandarin adaptation of the piece, and now adapts the play for a female narrator, where we follow her life after she recounts a traumatic childhood memory where she sees her mother in hospital after a suicide attempt.

To uplift her mother, the narrator begins to list down everything brilliant that’s worth living for, documented in sticky notes, expanding the list while she goes through life herself. The set-up for this is simple – Sharon stands in the middle of the stage, light bulbs hanging over us. Key to the show is how much camaraderie, trust and goodwill the performer builds up with the audience in order for them to become fully invested, and Sharon does that with earnestness and charm, listing down items such as sweet corn ice cream and her favourite colour yellow, the memories of playing hide and seek at the void deck. 

Every Brilliant Thing may sound sappy, but it is often a delicate balancing act of weighing out the sunshine and the storms. Early on, we already learn about her first encounter with death – when she has to euthanise her dog Snoopy, and it feels almost personal when an audience member comes to help her with that, making us realise how easily things can be taken away from us and how precious a life is. This segues into the scene leading to her mother’s suicide attempt – recalling her father picking her up, the conversation in the car, the curious whys that come flooding out, and the impossibility of responding with a proper answer. It is a vividly described scene, her father’s preferences and persona fleshed out, from the way he speaks, to his love for Led Zeppelin.

In beginning her list of every brilliant thing, Sharon manages eight pages of 214 items, before her mother comes home. We hear her mother’s favourite song, ABBA’s ‘I Have A Dream’. There is so much sadness in the scene with Sharon finding solace in her teacher Madam Tang, to berating her mother over her suicide attempt, yet, always holding onto the hope that things will change for the better.

For her, the list becomes a fundamental anchor even when she grows older. In her teens, she revisits it again, still aiming to hit 1000 items, all the way into her university days. In her car, we hear ‘Wake Me Up When September Ends’, and ‘Fix You’, both hinting at her mental state, wondering about the repetition of life’s routines. If anything, she reveals how her mother’s attempt has left such a profound impact on her, that it’s never left her mind. She begins to talk about the staggering suicide rates today, researching the guidelines on the dos and don’ts for a suicidal person. Strangely, that too is where she encounters her first love – the ‘charming’ Chia Ming, flirting with book titles like ‘You Had Me At Hello’.

While the original version of Every Brilliant Thing featured a male narrator, by having Sharon taking on the role, the female perspective is somehow different, even when the story is the same. There’s something about how she brings a sincerity to her performance, the look in her eyes as she gazes at us. We know and feel that this is a character who has genuinely been combating depression, the list like a life vest each time she feels the weight bear down on her. As she looks at it – she sees someone else’s handwriting on it; it’s Chia Ming’s, and at the thought of losing him, she makes sure to improve herself as well.  

At some point you wonder – does the list really enable her, or is it a crutch to consume her? Either way, the list eventually exceeds her initial goal of 1000 things, and even hits 2000. We hear Florence + The Machine’s ‘Lungs’ play, and there is a certain excitement that develops from there – she starts a Kallang Wave among the audience, and it seems to breathe life into us, as we get into it, filling us with energy as Sharon hypes us up, the euphoria taking over. Perhaps there is hope after all.

Every Brilliant Thing is testament to the power of good stories and how an excellent storyteller can leave such a strong impact. Sharon brings Chia Ming home, has dinner with him, they listen to Bob Dylan. It is something simple, yet strangely endearing and powerful. Sharon gets a chance to show off her vocals, singing ‘Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door’ and ‘Make You Feel My Love’, drawing us in and making us realise just how much joy she’s feeling. Now a married woman, we learn about the lows she needs to learn to deal with in order to secure her happiness. As she gets into a routine, we see her building up a life for herself, even with a pet cat Felix to take care of.

But life is never a straight path, and everything seems to come crumbling down when Chia Ming packs up and leaves, and Sharon is left all alone. All she has left is Madam Tang, who she trusts to give her the affirmation she needs. As she revives her list of every brilliant thing once again, the memories come flooding back, and we learn how her mother eventually completed her suicide. There are simply some things that are embedded and buried so deep within our own soul that it can seem impossible to overcome.

The list she has begins to grow, more and more, hitting a massive 999,999 before the big 1 million mark. A text from Chia Ming comes in, and “Make You Feel My Love” plays in the background, while Sharon pushes the box of sticky notes on the floor, spilling them all over before blacking out. We wonder if she’s consumed by the darkness within, completely and totally. But at the same time, we want to believe that it’s not over just yet, with the flicker of hope with light at the end of the tunnel.

By now, this is the third time we’re watching a staging of Every Brilliant Thing, but there’s something about Duncan Macmillan’s play that makes it so timeless, so relevant as the world becomes ever more stressful, and a reminder that there are indeed things to be grateful for and keep living for. Life will always have its ups and downs, bringing us to the lowest of lows, and the highest of highs. It can be exhausting, but it is in our nature to want to survive – and when we do, and begin to make the active choice to enjoy every brilliant thing that’s around us, perhaps that is when we do begin to see the light, and choose life, each and every day.

Photo Credit: Gateway Arts

Every Brilliant Thing played from 6th to 15th September 2024 at Gateway Theatre Black Box.